For When You're Feeling Insecure...
I wrote and re-wrote this intro because I just felt like I wasn't being as genuine as I could be. To be honest, it's actually super difficult finding a good balance in a blog.
You don't want your posts to be overly emotional and tell the truth about how you're feeling all the time because then your readers will be like "okay, we get it: your life sucks" but you also can't be too cheerful and happy 24/7 because then your readers will think you're fake and in-genuine.
But honestly, sometimes it's really draining trying to please people so I'm kind of at the point of not really caring and just writing how I feel in the way I feel I should. And asking for God's grace and guidance in doing so. So that being said, if you don't mind me getting a bit vulnerable - read on.
So, August was interesting.
I had a lot of lows, honestly. Majority of it came from struggling with feeling insignificant. I talked a little bit about this with a few people, but ever since I graduated, I've found that it's easy to get lost in the every day tasks of your job and lose perspective of what your true purpose is.
Honestly, for a bit, I was letting society define what was important. Compared to other people in my life and other careers I witnessed, I felt like my day-to-day job was kind of... insignificant. I wasn't saving lives in a hospital room, or making a difference at a Fortune 500 Company, or going to graduate school, or learning how to fight cases, or helping people walk again, or finding a cure for cancer.
I was just being me: a creative girl in the corporate world that works on a small (but awesome) marketing team in the financial industry.
And sometimes, it just didn't feel like I was doing enough.
It's not that I was unhappy in my job - I actually really love coming into work every day. And I truly believe that God lead me to this career field and has a special place in here for me.
No, the issue is that I continued to let other people define the hierarchy of significant careers, and it seemed as if my career, marketing to be specific, never made the cut.
And you know what?
Feeling insignificant really sucks.
Because here's a thing that I actually love and enjoy doing, yet the rest of the world doesn't think I'm doing "much" or that my career isn't important enough.
And I thought I was doomed into feeling this way until God really helped me switch my perspective and see two very important things.
1) Comparison is a trap.
Not only a trap, but literally the thief of joy. Nothing good comes of it. It's like every time we compare ourselves to someone else, we feel like we're trying to prove to the tiny voice in our head that we measure up. And if we don't and they're better than us in some sort of way, we feel crappy. And if we do measure up, we feel great until the next person comes that's better than us which makes us feel crappy all over again. Comparison is a never-ending trap that causes us to live between a window and a mirror.
And secondly –
2) Every single one of us, regardless of our skills, careers, or passions, are in the people business.
That means when it's all said and done, regardless of our skill set, career paths, degrees or job descriptions, we all have a purpose to impact others, in whatever way that God has blessed us to.
So when God looks at us, he doesn't see a doctor or lawyer or scientist.
He sees you, who needs to be at this place in this exact moment for a reason.
You may never know who specifically you're supposed to impact or where exactly you fall in God's plan - but all that's important, is that you're in it.
So, I can sit here and get 100% caught up in titles, and career choices, and prestige, or I can choose to keep living, laughing, loving and walking in His purpose, leaving an impact along the way.
You never know who you might miss because you spent all of your time wishing you were somewhere else.
So to September: Let it be filled with peace, joy, and the pursuit of people.
-Your (renewed) Corporate Queen
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.